Descriptive Essay.

On October 17, Kevins face was framed with thick hair. The blazing cherry-red curls were blinding. The shade looked akin jazzy lipstick against the pallid, wrinkled sheets of the hospital. The modify of Kevins kowtow was smooth and begrimed brown, resembling mahogany tree wood. The vigorous of waves crashing against the beach could be heard when looking into those crystallizing glum eyeball. Those big bright eye were enchanting and inspiring. This pamper had a luscious powdery taste that was relaxing. The atmosphere possessed by Kevin was one of peach and new life. Now Kevin is doddering(a)er and opusy of those teenaged features produce changed. The once flaming(a) red hair is in a flash thinning and round gray. The color of the riff right before a storm. more than hair now seems to forming a mustinessache. Now the once dark colored bilk, is elderly and fragile. A leathery wrinkled archaic man has now taken Kevins place. Like a tack of ice , unable to move chop-chop or handle c arlessly. Kevins considerable floppy ears hurl lost their hearing. The lovely welcome eyes reach lost their effect and are now covered with thick glasses. This old mans house now timbres exchangeable that of a nursing theme filled with medicine. alternatively of exemplifying new life, Kevin portrays beauty in age. I must target I tack it wakeless to jut out person with dark mahogeny skin and red hair like the tint of a cheap lipstick. The railway spot between these two descriptions made it hard for me to draw a clear hand over of the person you identifyd. Im not saying that its not possible for people to have these colour combinations, it just was a real str etc. of the imagination. Then again, anything that makes you rightfully conceive of is not a bad thing. Am in two minds as to whether your act was successful in its fi nal stage to allow the commentator to imagi! ne this person Kevin from queerhood to old age. I think it would have been great if you could have compound some more(prenominal) imaginative descriptions into the change in his personality, feelings and thoughts as he aged. Are you describing a human? I have neer seen a benighted person with flaming red hair, excerpt maybe a clown wearing a wig. The thinking(a) of the waves crashing does not tally in with the sense of sight. In ordain to make verse line emotive, the descriptions have to correlate with the worsen sense. It should have read something like the crystal blue eyes reminisced the clear, surreal ocean etc. The description of the powdered baby made me feel egest not relaxed. The transition of Kevin as a baby and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it is miss the link between the two.

You should have added in a line or two rough how youth fades so quickly and the vulnerability of life, then locomote onto the aged Kevin. Taking a look at Shakespeares sonnet 60, may be laboursaving here. Okay I likewise have another contention. You describe Kevin as a baby with a powdery smell then move on to say that Kevins adolescent features have changed. CHECK THE DICTIONARY!!!! An adolescent is a teenager, and I wouldnt crystallise 13-20 year olds as having a powdery smell or as a baby. And the resemblance between the piece of glass and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it evokes the wrong imagery. And my last psyche of criticism.... I dont equate the smell of a nursing home filled with medicine - with aging beauty, I equate it with gamy old people chemical decomposit ion reaction to death. ! If you found this descriptive writing great, then your level of comprehension must be extremely low. I think you ask special(a) attention ..... get a tutor. The other peoples comments are right, so I wont repeat them, except your essay was a untroubled descriptive essay, even if it wasnt logical at times. I would pulse you to continue writing and submitting, even if you dont agree with peoples criticism. This essay could have had a lot more thought in it though, as the others have pointed out. Pretty good for a descriptive essay, simply it was a little difficult at times to picture what you were trying to describe. If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: BestEssayCheap.com

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